tms - 42.2

[starkceo]

I was made to believe I'd never love somebody else // I made a plan, stay the man who can only love himself // Lonely was the song I sang, 'til the day you came // Showing me another way and all that my love can bring

About three days before my parents died, I remember hearing a pretty intense fight between them. I don't know what it was about, but after it was all over, he came upstairs and sat down on the edge of my bed. He looked at me with intense seriousness and told me something I pretty much decided already.

He told me to never fall in love. 

I think it was a comment made in the heat of the moment. He was angry, my Mom was upset and yeah, people say things they don't mean. It's human nature. Everyone does it. That was the last piece of advice he gave me, though, and I made a point to follow it pretty closely. Eventually, it just became my unwritten rule.    

Funny how fast a reputation can snowball. I quickly replaced my legacy of being my father's son into being a billionaire playboy. Did I care? Not really. I was still making the company what they wanted, and collecting the fat paycheques for doing it. And yet, while I was off taste testing a strawberry blonde, I had no idea my name was being used by a bunch of geriatric shareholders and a big bald guy to hide the fact they were trading my machines across enemy lines. Which, I might add, almost got me killed. 

Fool me once, shame on me.

That's besides the point. The point it all boils down to was that I couldn't, no I wouldn't,  let myself be distracted anymore. That was the new rule.

At least until I met her.

Right from the start, Claire Bennet could see a man I wasn't able to see. That's how it goes, right? I can look at myself in the mirror and see the Tony Stark that  ten million people read about in the morning paper. Why can't she? I'm a spoiled rich boy with a company and a bad reputation. No one takes me seriously, and I've never given them a reason to. But, she doesn't care, and what's worse is that I figured out that she loved me.

There's something very wrong with her. 

"Love". I'm not even sure I know what that word means. Never saw it between my parents. In fact, the only love I saw was the love my dad had for his company. Oh, and the love in his eyes when he knew I would be there to take everything over when he passed on. It's a selfish love. Guess things like that are hereditary.

The only love I have is for myself. 

God, you have no idea how many times I've tried to make her see that. I went as far as leaving for six months. I wanted her to forget about me, move on, find a guy who can give her what she deserves. But, I came back. I swore it was only to see her one more time, to end the chapter and finish the book. Imagine my surprise when I found out she had been waiting for me. A side of me was disgustingly happy that she did, but the other side repeated over and over that wasn't supposed to happen.

Alright.. plan B.

I'm not sure how long I'll have to try, but I'll do what I have to do to show her what she means to me. That doesn't mean getting married, or having kids. It means giving her a piece of me to remember.  Whatever she does with that memory is her choice. Hopefully she keeps it as a good one, because I finally realize now that I do love someone other than myself.

I love her, too.

X-posted to the_muses_stage 
Note: Claire is its_notluck